Browsing All posts tagged under »candida abrahamson«

But I got here first!: How birth order can effect sibling roles

October 24, 2014 by

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I’m a bit of a softie for sibling roles in family dynamics, and although there are definite limits to the validity of utilizing birth order to explain behavioral and personality traits, some value yet remains. Older research asserted a variety of characteristics to various birth-ordered children. It ranges from the 1975 Wark, Swanson and Mack […]

Running For Your Life: Depression and Exercise

October 20, 2014 by

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Unlike the lovely Ms. Diller, I love to exercise. It gets me going in the morning, it gives me energy throughout the day, it fights the ravages of age. I love it enough to want to talk about it–a lot. I like to discuss the new poses I’ve learned in yoga, my recent switch from […]

The Triangle–What It Looks Like In Family Life

October 16, 2014 by

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Molly* is a difficult [in my more honest moments I think of her as nearly tyrannical] early adolescent, who makes her mother’s life a horror. She picks on Mom’s clothes, her hairstyle–the way she chews her toast in the morning. It seems little escapes Molly’s critical eye, despite the fact that her mother Marge* has […]

The Family Hero, or “Morticia and the Psychiatrist”–Part II

October 15, 2014 by

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In his book, Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls, Robert Burney writes that “there are four basic roles that children adopt in order to survive growing up in emotionally dishonest, shame-based, dysfunctional family systems.” The children take these roles because they sense that the family’s dysfunction is so great, without their wearing the mantle of […]

The Family Hero, or “Morticia and the Psychiatrist”: Part I

October 12, 2014 by

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Remember the wondrously insane and macabre Addams family? (“They’re creepy and they’re kooky, mysterious and spooky/They’re all together ooky. . . .”) They were the anti-Partridge family, the inverse Brady Bunch, fabulously perverse, with two ghastly children, Wednesday (as in “Wednesday’s child is full of woe”), and her partner-in-crime Pugsley, whose unique hobby is stealing […]

Should I Stay or Should I Go?: Changing the Ground Rules #3: “I Changed My Mind”

October 4, 2014 by

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Betty and Brian* were confirmed atheists, and had been since they were teenagers. So when her Catholic family and his Jewish family protested about their marriage, they laughed at the small-mindedness of their parents and threw themselves a huge wedding bash. Lisa and Leon* knew one thing for certain–they didn’t want children. It was nice […]

Should I Stay or Should I Go?: Changing the Ground Rules #1: Losing a Career

September 30, 2014 by

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Before I leave the topic of issues to consider when you’re thinking of leaving your marriage, I wanted to bring up a few situations that make the decision to stay or go vastly more complicated. What happens in a marriage, and are you obligated to stay, when the very ground rules of that marriage have been […]

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