Browsing All Posts filed under »Bereavement«

Ok, So Who’s To Blame?: Explaining Cancer to Yourself–Breast Cancer Awareness Month

October 28, 2014 by


My friend’s son–somewhat of a haphazard student throughout high school–landed himself a spot in the class of 1996 at none other than Harvard University. I had to know more about this. “John,” I asked, “What do you think you did, maybe outside of school, maybe in extracurricular activities–I don’t know–that got you into Harvard?” “You […]

Complicated Bereavement: Mourning Someone You Never Really Knew

October 15, 2014 by


Well, I never really knew you ’til you said goodbye~Vince Gill If you want to know something about bereavement that slides from ‘normal’ to ‘complicated’ in a moment of revelation, due to unimaginable circumstances, you need look no further than to the mourning experiences of Julie Metz and Reeve Lindbergh. As you can see in my […]

Bereavement With Your Name On It: The ‘Unbereaved Bereaved’

September 5, 2014 by


In the totally bizarre way in which the world–and bereavement–works, sometimes you’re in the right (or should I say wrong?) place, at the right time, to be a mourner you don’t feel yourself to be, in a role you never wanted to play. Of course this is uncommon–and there is no literature on it to confirm […]

I Did It My Way: Different Paths to Adapting to Bereavement

August 22, 2014 by


I planned each charted course/Each careful step along the byway/And more, much more than this/ I did it my way . . ./I faced it all and I stood tall/And did it my way.” It was the year of the plague. I lost a client, a mere child, to leukemia. A long-standing client dropped dead […]

Faking Grief: When an Expression Reveals the Truth

August 18, 2014 by


My son–now a professor, an educator of today’s youth, a scientist in search of truth–was, in his salad days, a world-class faker. He particularly perfected his art when it came to faking illness in order to get out of school. Our growing skepticism spurred him to new heights of creativity, and his theatrics were something […]

Not ‘Normal’ Anymore?: Complicated Bereavement

August 14, 2014 by


I am not just the founding mother, but am also the most decorated member of my children’s fan club. At rallies I come equipped with buttons, balloons and noise-makers, wearing electric blue shirts with the kids’ names inscribed.  I’m a complete embarrassment, but I want my support known. Their spouses can’t hold a candle to […]

Interventions For Mourners–and Why Sometimes Research Can Be A Real Downer

August 11, 2014 by


“Do not put your faith in what statistics say until you have carefully considered what they do not say.” ~William W. Watt I’m going to really go out on a limb here. Forthcoming: one of those big assumptions about humankind in general. Consider yourself  warned. Here it is: I don’t believe (you still with me?) […]


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